Fun with Sea Turtles

Today we went to Jekyll Island in southeast Georgia to visit the GA Sea Turtle Center.  Ellie has been really into animals lately, so I thought she would have fun watching the turtles.  She really enjoyed watching them swim around and giggled a lot while watching them.  Here are some pictures from our day:

Tiny baby hatchlings learning the ways of the world inside a tank.  They'll be released when they get a little bigger.

Watching the turtles swim

Watch out for that turtle, Ellie!

Baby gator, up close and personal

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

We had a wonderful Christmas season this year!  Last year, I was scheduled to have surgery a few days before Christmas, so we were anticipating that I would not be able to travel.  I ended up not having the surgery (I developed mastitis that day, and had 102 degree temp in pre-op.  I got IV antibiotics instead of my wound being cleaned out), but we still stayed home.  It was so nice to be at our own home and start establishing our own traditions, so we decided to stay home again this year.

Zoo Lights with Mama

On Dec. 23 we went to Zoo Lights, to see the Zoo decorated for Christmas.  Most of the animals were not out, but we did see the giraffes and the jaguars, as well as walk through the reptile house.  It was a lot of fun, though it was hot!  Florida weather is so funny, we were sweating in 80 degree temps two days before Christmas, now we're cold in 40 degrees less than two weeks later. 

Zoo Lights with Daddy

Christmas Eve was super busy for me, but Ellie went to school for a half-day.  After school, we went to Church.  After dinner, Ellie opened her two Christmas Eve presents -- Christmas pajamas, and a Christmas book (this year, "Goodnight, North Pole").  Then, it was time for Ellie to go to sleep so Santa would come visit.

 

Ellie after Christmas Eve Mass

Opening Christmas Eve presents

On Christmas morning, Ellie woke up to find that Santa had come!  He brought her an art table and two stools.  She can color and paint at the table, and it's just her size.  She got a lot of other great toys and books, and had so much fun opening her (and our) presents.  My cousin Zach who lives nearby came to spend the day with us too, which was really nice.  All three of us woke up congested, so I was glad I had done most of my breakfast and dinner prep the day before.  I was able to rest most of the day, and we still had some great holiday meals.  All in all, Ellie had a great second Christmas, and we can't wait for next year, when she'll have a better understanding of what's going on. 

 

Yay!  Santa came!

One happy little girl

Opening presents...

...but, the best part is all the empty boxes to play in!







Bittersweet Ending

Wow! It's been a while since I've posted.  I guess time really does fly when you're having fun...

I finally stopped pumping.  It wasn't easy.  It wasn't my decision, either.  My body just quit on me and I stopped producing milk.  This was a bittersweet moment for me.  On one hand, I was so tired of pumping.  I had wanted to quit (in my brain) for months!  On the other hand, I wanted to offer Ellie the best I could for as long as I could and (in my heart) wasn't ready to give up. 

I actually was prepared to stop pumping when Ellie turned one year old.  At her 1 year checkup, though, her pediatrician convinced me to keep going.  She told me that even if I was only giving her 4-8 oz of breast milk a day it was still beneficial.  And, since Ellie was about to start day care for the first time in her life, it would really pay off by having extra antibodies from my milk.  So I kept up with it.  But, I couldn't commit as much time to pumping as I had for the first year.  For one thing, Ellie was so much more active, so pumping for 30 minutes a day, 4-5 times a day just wasn't going to happen.  I couldn't continue to take pumping breaks at work (my employer was fantastically supportive, don't get me wrong, I just needed to focus on work, not milk-making at work, totally my decision, no one ever said a negative word about my pumping at work).  So, I dropped to 2 pumps a day.  30 minutes each: first thing in the morning, and again after I got home from work.

For a while I continued to get about 4-6 oz a day.  Then it gradually tapered off to 2-3 oz.  About that same time I was just so tired of pumping, I dropped my evening pump.  For the next month I pumped 30 minutes every morning, and weekly noticed that I was getting only 1 oz a day, then 1/2 oz a day.  I knew the end was in sight, but I kept trying.  I took supplements, drank lots of water, ate oatmeal, and so on...

But, the day after Thanksgiving I was pumping and after 30 minutes had mere droplets.  I knew that I was done.  It was a relief.  But I was (am) so sad.  Here's the thing: I kicked pumping's ass.  I know that.  I did it for 16.5 months.  That's bad ass, right?  Lots of moms aren't able to nurse for that long.  So I  recognize all the hard work that I put into providing the best possible nutrition for my daughter (and believe me, pumping every hour for 20 minutes with a 6 week old is no easy task, but that's what it took, so that's what I did).  But, (there's always a but, right?) I wasn't able to nurse in the first place.  So, I still feel like a failure.  Just a little part of me, but it's there.  And, I felt like a failure again when at 6 months we had to start supplementing because I wasn't producing enough to sustain her.  I think a part of me, while I really wanted to stop pumping long before I did, kept going because of the guilt of not being able to nurse, and having to use formula instead of being able to exclusively breastfeed.  I felt like if I could give her breast milk for just a little longer, maybe it'd offset some of what she lacked by getting so much formula.  Is that crazy?  Probably.

I realize I'm being hard on myself, and that I did everything I could, but.... Just but.... If my body hadn't quit on me a couple of weeks ago, I'd still be pumping.  Not wanting to, but not wanting to give up either.  So, I'm glad I'm done.  I'm glad I didn't make the choice, but my body did.  I'm also sad that I'm done.  And I feel a little bit like I've let her down by not being able to make it to 18 months.  But, I also feel like a bad ass milk pumper, because I am, and I'm so proud of everything I accomplished (and so, so, so grateful for the support of my husband, because I could not have done it without him).  So, the end of my pumping career is both bitter and sweet -- bittersweet.  And, I think I'm okay with that. 

Also, clearly Ellie is happy, healthy, and active.  I know that, in part, that is because of me, and the BM I was able to provide her, so that makes things easier.  Here she is playing at the zoo for the Halloween Spooktacular (sorry, I haven't uploaded Thanksgiving pictures yet, this is the most recent I have right now). 

Happy Halloween!!!

Ellie's second Halloween was a little more eventful than her first.  This year, she even got to go trick-or-treating!

Ellie started her Halloween celebrations with a parade at her school. 

Then, after a quick dinner of pizza, we went trick-or-treating in our neighborhood.  Lots of the houses were dark, but Ellie had fun knocking on doors and taking candy out of bowls and putting it into her pumpkin bucket.

Olustee Battlefield

Last weekend we went on a drive through the Okefenokee Swamp.  We stopped at Olustee Battlefield to check it out.  It was the site of the Civil War's Battle of Olustee in 1864.  This was the largest Civil War battle in the state of Florida, and was won by the Confederacy.

There wasn't a whole lot to do there.  They have small visitor's center that has some information about the battle, a monument, and a couple of cannons.  You can walk around the battlefield, but it was so hot and humid that we didn't want to spend too much time walking around outside.  Ellie ran around in the field for a few minutes and had fun.  And, then, we continued our tour of the Okefenokee, driving up into Georgia and then back home to Jacksonville.  Jeff got some really cute shots of Ellie playing at the battlefield:

Oh, No!

I just found this video I took on Easter this year.  Ellie is making the noise with her lips, but her daddy doesn't know that...It cracks me up every time!

The Park

Ellie has so much fun playing at the park!